"It's a........David, why don't you tell us."
"It's a boy!"
"No. No. No, it isn't. ......... No."
"Well, there's a penis, so I think it is."
I remember just laying there in shock. I remember thinking,'it can't be a boy'. I remember saying his cry sounded like Joel's. Duh, he's a newborn- they all sound pretty similar. I remember throwing up. In all fairness, that was probably due more to the anesthetic than the shock. I remember wondering what in the heck we were going to name him. David was pushing Daniel instead of Isaiah.
I was SO positive this baby was a girl. I was nauseous just like I was with both girls. With Joel, I had some nausea, but at random times, not every afternoon and evening without fail. This baby just squirmed around and kicked enough to know it was awake, but nothing painful. With Joel, he kicked so hard I thought he was trying to kick his way out. It HURT. Not just "hey kid, quit kicking me in the ribs" kind of hurt. I'd yell at him and hit him back kind of hurt. This pregnancy was just like both girls; this baby must be a girl too.
After we checked into the hospital and they got all the preliminary stuff done, David and I had about an hour to sit in our room before surgery. I remember asking him if, when Zach was born, he was disappointed that he wasn't a girl. He said no, he was surprised, but then the joy of having a baby sort of took over and he didn't really care. Odd that I asked him that, since that exact situation was about to happen to me.
But I did care. I wanted Leah. I wanted another sweet little girl to dress up in all my cute little girl clothes. Even as I sat in my hospital room, poring over a name book some nurse dug up for me, I mourned that this wasn't my Leah. I suppose I simply mourned my expectations, and mourned the fact that I would never have another girl. I was happy about a boy, because I also remember rocking Joel to sleep many nights, mourning the fact that I {thought I} wouldn't have another boy. But when life doesn't hand you what you expect, you have to readjust to the new reality.
Now I have another son.
"It's a boy!"
"No. No. No, it isn't. ......... No."
"Well, there's a penis, so I think it is."
I remember just laying there in shock. I remember thinking,'it can't be a boy'. I remember saying his cry sounded like Joel's. Duh, he's a newborn- they all sound pretty similar. I remember throwing up. In all fairness, that was probably due more to the anesthetic than the shock. I remember wondering what in the heck we were going to name him. David was pushing Daniel instead of Isaiah.
I was SO positive this baby was a girl. I was nauseous just like I was with both girls. With Joel, I had some nausea, but at random times, not every afternoon and evening without fail. This baby just squirmed around and kicked enough to know it was awake, but nothing painful. With Joel, he kicked so hard I thought he was trying to kick his way out. It HURT. Not just "hey kid, quit kicking me in the ribs" kind of hurt. I'd yell at him and hit him back kind of hurt. This pregnancy was just like both girls; this baby must be a girl too.
After we checked into the hospital and they got all the preliminary stuff done, David and I had about an hour to sit in our room before surgery. I remember asking him if, when Zach was born, he was disappointed that he wasn't a girl. He said no, he was surprised, but then the joy of having a baby sort of took over and he didn't really care. Odd that I asked him that, since that exact situation was about to happen to me.
But I did care. I wanted Leah. I wanted another sweet little girl to dress up in all my cute little girl clothes. Even as I sat in my hospital room, poring over a name book some nurse dug up for me, I mourned that this wasn't my Leah. I suppose I simply mourned my expectations, and mourned the fact that I would never have another girl. I was happy about a boy, because I also remember rocking Joel to sleep many nights, mourning the fact that I {thought I} wouldn't have another boy. But when life doesn't hand you what you expect, you have to readjust to the new reality.
Now I have another son.
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