Sunday Shopping

Walgreens:

I wouldn't have gone this week, but I had a $10RR I had to spend, so I bought some Easter candy and found a few good clearance things.
Spent today: $4.39
Spent ytd: $107.79
Saved ytd: $376.52

RiteAid:

After I got home, I realized that only $4 of my $6 UP+ rewards were used because one thing I bought was on sale and I hadn't spent as much as I'd planned. So I went back later and bought 7 Russell Stover coconut cream eggs- yum! The total is for everything, even though the eggs aren't pictured.
Spent today:$ 1.50
Spent ytd: $80.33
Saved ytd: $160.20
Have: $1.99 UP+

Questions

I'll admit it. I watch 19 Kids and Counting. I started watching it more as a "how-to" because I do not know how someone takes care of that many small children. I've realized, of course, that the older kids take care of the younger kids. What I needed was 6 Kids and Counting. That was when I actually would've gotten some pointers. But I've come to really like the show.

Tonight was the episode when their 20th child died. Technically, it was really just a miscarriage; did we need a full-fledged funeral? But, considering that the civilized world knew she was prego, they probably had to do things a bit differently than us normal folk. And as I watched said funeral, I started thinking about my younger brother.

I really don't know how far along mom was when he died; I think it was about five months, but I was six- what did I know. I don't know how far along she was when she found out he was dead- I think she thought he'd been dead a couple weeks by the time she found out. I don't know what labor was like, just that she was induced. I do remember asking her once how big he was, and she said he was tiny and fit in the palm of her hand. I never asked why she didn't name him. I wonder, if grandpa hadn't just died and had a cemetary plot, would he even have been buried? I never asked why she didn't take a single picture of her only son.

As I sat here and cried over this little girl half a continent away, from a family I've never even met, I realize how many questions I never bothered to ask about my own flesh and blood. So many things that I can't ask now; the only person who knew the answers is gone. And I wonder- what other questions am I not asking? I know there aren't many years left with several people; I fully expect to lose the remaining grandparents and parent within the next ten years. And I hope that I don't have nearly as many unasked questions when they're gone.

New Words

Daniel has started saying two new words this week- Doo-a and Gee-go. That's Dora and Deigo for people who don't speak his dialect. I will be extremely glad when all of my children are past the stage of adventuring with young hispanic explorers who always seem to be yelling.

I love the moment when I realize that one of my children has actually listened to the stuff I say. Today I asked Joel to put away the chairs to his little table. He picked up both of them and started back to the table. I said, "Wow- both at once?" He replied, "God gave us two hands, so I can carry two things."

Sunday Shopping

Walgreens:

Spent today: $1.38
Spent ytd: $103.40
Saved ytd: $353.04
Have: $10RR

RiteAid:

Because I returned something that was supposed to trigger an UP+ but didn't, I had a negative total balance today.
Spent today: - $1.15
Spent ytd: $78.83
Saved ytd: $146.20
Have: $6 UP+

Morbid Fascination

Naomi was asking today what I liked best in the world, besides the munchkins. I wasn't paying a whole lot of attention to her, but she kept hounding me, so I finally asked why she wanted to know. "Well, we have to figure out what to put on that stone thing we put over your head when you die." I told her we didn't need to worry about it quite yet and we'd talk about it later. "Ok, we can talk about it tomorrow; you'll be a little bit closer to dying then."

Sunday Shopping

Walgreens:This was all they had...I made Grouchy Boy check.

Spent today: $21.72
Spent ytd: $102.02
Saved ytd: $318.23
Have: $10 RR


RiteAid:

Observant persons might notice that there are only 3 Gardettos in this photo. I bought 4; one just didn't make it to photo time.
Spent today: $5.45
Spent ytd: $79.98
Saved ytd: $113.20
Have: $16 UP+

Sunday Shopping

And I thought I was done with RiteAid...I don't like how they're not printing out the UP+ rewards anymore, but when they have such a good sale on diapers, I can't help but go. And tomorrow, I'm dragging David to a different RiteAid to sign him up for a rewards card so I can buy more diapers. He'll do just about anything for Reeses!

Spent today: $29.23
Spent ytd: $45.30
Saved ytd: $52.26
Have $15 UP+

ETA: I did this same transaction the next day with another card so I could get another $15 UP+. So the new totals are:
Spent ytd: $74.53
Saved ytd: $69.65
Have: $30 UP+

Delay

This week, my Walgreens excursion was very delayed, thanks to a trip to visit the old folks on Sunday. Had I had my stuff together, I would've gone on the way there, and I don't even remember why last Saturday was busy enough that I didn't go through the sales. Boring week anyway, so it didn't make a difference.

Spent today: $ .39
Spent ytd: $80.30
Saved ytd: $305.48

Sunday Shopping

Walgreens:

Spent today:$ 3.04
Spent ytd: $79.91
Saved ytd: $295.49
Have $2RR

RiteAid:
Here's the problem with utilizing Register Rewards and UP+ Rewards: they expire. RiteAid hasn't had much lately that I need, and I had to use my $2UP, so today was 'stock up for Valentine's Day and David's birthday with candy' day.

Spent today: $1.96
Spent ytd: $16.07
Saved ytd: $ 34.87

The things you find at work!

That title sounded more exciting than Tuesday Shopping. This morning one of the assistants gave me a bunch of coupons that had been in some package she was unloading. One was a Listerine one that we have a million of, but the other was a $2 Reach coupon......and I remembered that Walgreens had Reach floss on sale, because I couldn't find my coupon that would've make it free after RR and I wasn't going to pay for floss! Ta-da: now I make a dollar on each pack I buy this week. Granted, it gives me a bunch of rewards I have to roll, but there's always an 8/$1 item around holidays- pencils or cups or something easy to use the rewards with.

So, off to Walgreens I went at lunch, and since they were very well-stocked on floss and toothbrushes, I'll be going there every day at lunch to buy my two packs of floss and make my two dollars. Depending on how nice the cashier is, I may make four or five dollars each day!


Spent today: $2.50
Spent ytd: $70.62
Saved ytd: $242.32
Have: $4 RR from today, and $5RR from Sunday

Edited to add: I did a few more trips, so by the end of the week these were the new totals:
Spent ytd: $76.87
Saved ytd: $257.74
Have: $19 RR

Sunday Shopping

Walgreens:

Spent today: Subtotal was $0, after tax, $2.15
Spent ytd: $ 68.12
Saved ytd: $ 236.15
Have: $5RR, also will get $4 rebate for VitD

Validation

Dr. Jan is not a friendly person. She's a nice person, but not friendly. It took about a year before she'd even really talk to me much. The Thursday hygienist has been at our office for two years and is still scared of Jan. But I really like her and we chat most of the days she's there. Not heart-to-heart talks, but fun conversations that she often initiates. She doesn't really have many friends because she's a pretty private person, and I feel sorry for her because her husband is the biggest liability and source of stress in her life. Sound like anyone else we knew?

For a week or two after I told Todd I was going to be leaving, Jan didn't really talk to me. I expected that, I suppose. I knew she wouldn't be happy, if only because it was just one more thing to deal with. Lord knows she has plenty already. But eventually she warmed back up.

Today we were both standing in the hall- she was stretching her arms and I was putting photos in the computer- and she said "I've been meaning to tell you how much I appreciate that you've stuck around and helped out while we look for just the right person, and for helping out with Lori's schedule." That shocked me enough, but she went on to say that she was really happy for me, that it took a lot of courage to make that kind of change, and she hoped I enjoyed being home with the kids.

I don't care much what Todd thinks or if he's ok with my leaving, but I really didn't want to disappoint Jan. It's nice to know that, even if it is disappointing to have to start over, she understands why I'm making this choice and is happy for me.

If You're Worried and You Can't Sleep.....

Just count your blessings instead of sheep. Some people will have no idea what that is in reference to. Some people should watch more classic movies.

The other night Hope climbed into my bed, crying, because it was after 10:00pm and she couldn't fall asleep. She'd read for awhile, laid there, read some more, tried everything she could think of, but couldn't sleep.

More to give her something different to think about, I sang her that song and told her to try it. We snuggled for a couple of minutes and thought of things to be thankful for, and then she went back to bed.

The next morning she was amazed that it worked! She told me she'd been in the middle of thanking God for all of her cousins and listing as many as she could think of. That's all she remembers- trying to think of cousins. And now she has a wonderful new way to go to sleep- focusing on the myriad of things in her life to give thanks for.

Sunday Shopping

Walgreens:

I bought some Valentine's stuff that was on sale in addition to the other stuff I was going to spend my RRs on. And I might go back and spend my new $4RR on as many Coconut Creme Hearts as they'll let me buy.

Spent today: $6.72
Spent ytd: $65.97
Saved ytd: $199.49
Have: $14 in RR

RiteAid:

Spent today: $3.69
Spent ytd: $14.11
Saved ytd: $30.89
Have: $2 UP+

Who Loves You

As I was putting Joel to bed, I asked him who loved him the mostest in the whole wide world. His first guess was me; then he said God. And who loves him the mostest after God? Mom, and then Hank, then dad, and then Grant.

Sunday Shopping

Walgreens:

Spent today: $17.83
Spent ytd: $59.25
Saved ytd: $153.86
Have: $20 in RR

Snow snow snow snow snow!

I succumbed. I wimped out. I called work and told them I was snowed in.

Sunday and Monday, driving was stressful but not bad. Yesterday I had to take the van, which, although it is supposed to be AWD, I don't like nearly as much as the Subaru. Maybe it's just more top-heavy? But I feel like I slide around more in the van. I slid past the turn for daycare- not a big deal since I just took another way up the hill. I slid trying to turn into our driveway, and slid again trying to back out of the driveway. But going to pick the kids up from daycare, I got halfway up a hill and got stuck. Sliding backwards, brakes locked, no steering- tons of fun. Did a 23-point turn, got back down, and tried another hill that is more of a main road. I really did wonder if they'd just have to spend the night at Priscilla's house. My four were the only ones who showed up- nobody else was brave/dumb enough to be out in the snow.

A bunch of other stuff went wrong last night, as always happens when David is gone, and I was frustrated and upset that Todd is such a....I don't even know what he is.....but when everything else around is closed and state patrol is telling people to just stay home unless they absolutely have to drive, he won't close the office. Ok, I understand that you're from Michigan and Utah. You're used to snow. So am I. But you live half a mile from the office. Without any hills. I don't. I live five miles and six closed roads from the office. And yet the world might end if I don't clean a few peoples' teeth today.

So I decided to act like a West Sider. I could've gotten out if I really had to. The roads are icy, but there's snow and traction. But what about lunchtime when I have to come home to let Hank out. What about 5 o'clock when I have to go get the kids. Will the roads be an ice rink? I don't know, and I don't want to find out.

I'm already researching Subaru options for my next car.

Sunday Shopping

Walgreens:
I bought these pills because they were free after RR and I have a bunch of money to roll. Buying these bought me an extra week in trying to spend my RR money.

Spent today: $1.72 (just the tax on these items)
Spent ytd: $41.42
Saved ytd: $118.10
Have: $22 in RR

RiteAid:

Spent today: $5.82
Spent ytd: $10.42
Saved ytd: $23.09
Have: $1 UP+

Monday Shopping Just Doesn't Have the Same Ring To It...

But that's what it was. I found a current coupon for floss so it was free after RR, and I had to buy the 39¢ Crunch bars as fillers. One disappeared on the drive home- that's why there's only one in the picture.

Spent today: $7.75
Spent ytd: $39.70
Saved ytd: $54.68
Have $22 RR

Sunday Shopping

I only went to Walgreens today. RiteAid didn't have much that looked very good. The dilemma, though, is that I have a bunch of UP+ rewards that expire next week, so I just have to hope that next week has better sales than this week, or I'm going to be buying something I don't need just to use up the rewards.

Walgreens:

Spent today:$27.09
Spent ytd: $31.95
Saved ydt: $32.07
Have: $23 RR

I'm really contemplating doing the Prevacid deal again. After the RR, it's only $6 for a month's supply. But Grouchy Boy was the only checker there this morning, and the coupon wouldn't scan. I could wait until tonight and go when some of the smilier employees are there...

Notice

Today I told Todd that I intended to quit. He was shocked, to say the least. I told him to stop talking and listen to me so I could explain. I'm being very nice; I simply told him I wanted to be a mom. I didn't tell him that I was sick of his mood swings, condescending attitude, lectures, negativity, micromanaging.....

Some of this is bad timing on my part, since Lori has been out since October with a hurt arm and currently isn't coming back until at least the start of Feb, but instead of just having temps fill in for her, we can have working interviews, and if they do find someone to replace me, I can just transition to filling in for her until she's back to working all her normal days. I tried to focus on the positive side of the situation.

There will be several awkward days as he works through his shock and stress, but I told him I'd stick around for awhile to help- I'm not just going to drop everyone in the middle of the mess and leave. Although some days I'd like to, if it only affected Todd. But it doesn't. It affects the rest of my coworkers, Dr. Jan, the patients, and my future. Todd is outspoken and opinionated, and since I'll have to list him as a reference, I'd better make sure he'll say something nice.

Bad side of giving him my notice: now David is backtracking and saying he doesn't think it's a good idea for me to quit. After he flat-out told me to quit my job in Sept. After I've talked about it and planned for it since he said I could quit. After he knew I told Priscilla that we'd be leaving the daycare, and after he knew that all my coworkers knew I was planning to leave. Now he doesn't think it's a good idea. I'm chooing to ignore that comment.

Sunday Shopping

New year, new plans, old idea.....I've wanted to track how much I save vs spend for a long time, to see which store is actually more of a $$ saver and how much I really save. And it will force me to blog, which I always want to do and never get around to. So, Sunday #1:
Walgreens:
Spent: $4.86
Saved: $10.32
Have: $5 RR


RiteAid:
Spent: $4.60
Saved: $6.89
Have: $2 UP+

Wonder what's on sale next week that I need? :)

Halloween

Ah, darkness, masks, and candy... is there a more perfect combo?

My poor children do not get to decide what they want to be for halloween and go pick out a costume like normal kids. They get whatever was 75% off at Target last year, or whatever leftover costume is in the halloween tub. None of them wanted to be what they were, except Joel, and that was just because I wanted him to be something different.

Hope was Supergirl. Target special from last year. Almost too small. But for one night, she can wear it. She wanted to be a ninja or a zombie. Vetoed on both counts. But I did tell her I'd look for a ninja costume for next year. (didn't find one, although with some black clothing and some sort of mask, it might be pretty easily faked.)

Naomi was supposed to be an angel. She even had a costume party two weeks ago and wore the angel outfit. But for some reason she saw Hope's old dance outfit and wanted to be a ballerina instead. The sleeveless shirt was much too cold, so we added an ultra-classy black teeshirt underneath. Hey, she stayed warm, or at least didn't complain about being cold.

Joel just had to be Darth Vader as soon as he saw the costume. It was way too big but I bought it because it was a pretty nice costume to still be on the 75% off rack. I just wanted to see if he would fit into it next year or if he had two more years before it would fit. But no. He had to be Darth NOW. So, some creative tucking and safety-pinning and a hunt for a red light saber, and he was maskless Darth. For some reason he'd never leave the mask on for more than ten seconds. I figured a basic costume and red light saber- even star-wars-illiterate me could figure out who he was dressed up as.
And Daniel the skunk. Every kid has worn this outfit, so I had to make him wear it too. But he was less than pleased about it. I got him dressed and he lasted about 10 minutes before the fit-throwing began. So we took him out of the skunk suit. The only problem was we hadn't done pictures yet, so after a few-minute break, he had to get dressed again. No trick or treating for him; after the outfit was off the second time, he got a bottle and some quality time in his bed. My last little skunk. Maybe I'll use it again next year for him. One last baby skunk...

Zach said he wanted to take the kids trick or treating this year. I intended to go, but I figured Joel might be better without me, so Zach took all three of the munchkins by himself. I think he just wanted first dibs on their candy.

Pirate's Baby

The last time we went to Arizona, Linda's dog Pirate just about had a heart attack from having so many kids around. He's used to just Linda and Keith, and he has one other dog buddy that comes over some to visit. He stayed hidden under a bed most of the time we were there.

Last summer when we were in Oregon with David's family, we reminded the kids that Pirate doesn't want to be bugged or petted or disturbed. He took off as soon as we walked in. Even when the kids were on the beach and it was just adults, he didn't want to be messed with. Until he discovered Daniel.

Once he figured out that Daniel couldn't do anything to him, he followed that baby around wherever we took him. He slept by Daniel's blanket. He laid next to Daniel's bouncy chair. When Daniel started to cry, Pirate would run to whatever adult was nearest to make sure you knew his baby was crying and needed some attention.





This weekend when we got to David's aunt's house, Pirate was already asleep. But the next morning when all the kids were playing in the backyard, Pirate made sure to keep his distance. Even when I tried to pet him, he backed away. His spot was directly under Linda's feet or in the house. Until Daniel came outside.

I really think he remembered Daniel's smell or something. As soon as that little boy started toddling around, Pirate started following him. Daniel played in the dogs' water dish, and instead of hiding, Pirate sat there and watched him. We got Daniel a bunch of ice cubes to play with, and he and Pie sat on the porch for half an hour and just played with the ice. Daniel would feed a cube to Pirate, and the dog would actually take it from him. It was amazing how that dog remembered that this little boy used to be his baby.

History Lesson

Hope tripped while walking to the bathroom Sunday while we were camping. Her knees were pretty skinned up and one was bleeding quite a bit. She isn't the bravest of souls and was milking her injury for all it was worth. We were in the motorhome putting a bandaid on her knee, and instead of really sympathizing with her, I said, "Ya know, Uncle Ron got shot with a gun. Maybe you should ask him if that hurt worse than scraping your knee."

Ron and Cindy had come for the afternoon, hence my comment about him getting shot. As we got out of the motorhome, I asked her if she wanted to ask him about it. She said she wanted to know, but wanted me to ask. So when we got over to their campsite, I said, "Uncle Ron, Hope wants you to tell her about getting shot." Perhaps I should've been more clear: she wanted to know if it hurt. But with Ron, you never get one-word answers.

He told her all about it, more than I've ever heard:
-who all was in the boat
-he was supposed to be delivering the boat and then leaving the country for a week of R&R- obviously that didn't happen
-he was driving the boat
-he initially didn't realize he'd been more than grazed
-he was hurt worse than anyone else in the boat
-it took almost three hours after he was shot before he was even evacuated
-it took a couple more hours to get to the hospital
-he nearly bled to death before he got into surgery
-it was almost a week before anyone here knew

He never did really answer her 'did it hurt' question. It was typical Ron story-telling, and this morning Hope asked me if he really got shot; she didn't even know whether or not to believe him. But I hope, years from now, when she learns about VietNam in history class, she'll remember that hour, and that what he told her will make the war a little more real and a little more personal. I wish history classes could be taught by people who helped make the history.

Blowout

The trip home from GCF wasn't quite as uneventful as I would've liked. One of the rear tires on the motorhome blew out before we got to Ellensburg. We got to spend two hours in the motorhome barely on the side of the road, and feel the shaking of the vehicle every time anything else drove by. Sucked. But....

...thankfully, we had AAA and someone to call to help.

...thankfully, David didn't lose control of the motorhome when the tire popped.

...thankfully, we weren't far from Oma and Opa's house, so they could come get us and take us back to their house.

...thankfully, the battery on the Escalade was fully charged so Oma and Opa could come get us:)

...thankfully, we were over the Vantage hill and not coming down the freeway toward the river.

...thankfully, we had plenty of water in the refrigerator and snacks for the kids to eat.

...thankfully it wasn't 95 degrees

...thankfully, we had air conditioning

...and thankfully, we had a fully charged battery to use lights

...thankfully, neither of us had to be at work on Monday morning.

...thankfully, I'd done laundry Friday, so I didn't spend the entire time going over lists of what needed to be done when I finally got home.

...thankfully, so many things that could've gone wrong didn't happen and we all got home safely a day later than planned.

I think the person who developed antidepressants probably has a special place in heaven. Due to vacation, I've taken mine once in the past two weeks, and I can feel the crying freakshow just beneath the surface. It's amazing how a change in one little chemical can make a person go from holy freaky batman to relatively normal. Never would I claim to be entirely normal:)

A trip to hell.....I mean, the midwest during July.

I have every confidence that hell feels so much worse. But I'm not sure how. I didn't know I could sweat from some places, but since sweat was pouring from every pore in my body, I must be able to.

Other than the weather, we had a great time in Byron. We left Friday night after David got home from his trip- we figured he was wide awake anyway, and we could take advantage of the overnight driving to provide a few hours of sleep for the kids. Didn't work as well as we'd hoped. We filled up with gas when we left home and drove until Spokane. We got there about 3:15am and, of course, everyone woke up when the car stopped. Unfortunately, they didn't go back to sleep. Looooong morning when it starts at 3am.


We stopped for the kids to get out and move around some at several rest stops between here and Illinois, but that was about all we stopped at. Drove by the Mount Rushmore exit, Sturgis, all the LittleHouseonthePrarie towns and museums, Wall Drug, the Corn Palace, the Spam museum....all the must-see places between here and there. But we saw some killer rest stops. Not really. And Minnesota was kind enough to close all their rest stops to save the state money. But since I got a speeding ticket halfway through the state, I'm sure they'll have the funds to reopen them. Seriously, WHO closes every rest stop in the entire state in the summer?? Do it in January when no one in their right mind is driving through.


We discovered that the heat is actually tolerable if you stay in the shade. It's really not bad if you're in the shade and there's a breeze. The kids didn't much care- they played outside on all Amy's toys no matter how hot it was. Andre has a six-wheeler that he drove the kids all around on. Joel had a gay 'ole time playing with the dog- he even hung out in the dog kennel for awhile.


When it was too stinkin' hot to be outside, the kids were in luck! Amy has every fun toy/book/video game known to man. The kids were in heaven! They played Rock Band a ton- Joel even used a broken guitar that wasn't plugged in and had a fabulous time "rockin' out", as he said. Taylor has a drum set in her room that the kids played at first, but she quickly realized that Joel chose not to follow the rule of 'only play it when I'm in here', so the drum set became offlimits. And since Amy works at a video store, she brought home all sorts of movies for the kids to watch.



One day we spent the entire day at the Rock River at Amy's cabin. Unfortunately, the cabin was torn down and is being rebuilt, and it isn't much more than just walls. The toilet is in the bathroom, but not hooked up yet. The air conditioner is in and hooked up, but there's no insulation yet so it only cools things a few degrees. We all fought over who got to sit next to the A/C vents:) The kids had SO much fun in the water! They all absolutely LOVED it! The river is muddy and dirty, but the water was cool. I stayed at the cabin during Daniel's nap while the rest of them went out in the boat. I knew being on the water in the sun on the boat would not be good for my insta-fry skin. The kids all got to ride on the jetbob; the jetskis weren't working very well so only David and Joel got to ride on them. I'd told David in the past that if we ever moved back there we'd get a set of jetskis to keep at the cabin; getting to ride Andre's for a few minutes made him think having his own would be a wonderful idea:)


The trip back was not fun. Actually it seemed like we made better time, but the anticipation of fifteen hours each day in the car was bad. Poor Daniel cried most of the time he was awake both days; I think not having any real time to move around was messing up his intestines. But considering how far we drove with four little kids, I think everyone put up with the driving remarkably well. And Joel went from sorta potty trained to not even needing a pull-up- I don't know why being on the trip made it click, but he got great at telling us when he needed to stop. Maybe because he wanted out of the car and that was one sure-fire way to get dad to pull over:)

Funny things kids say

Joel and Naomi have both said a bunch of funny things lately. And since I'll never remember them if I don't write them down:

Joel- lately he always needs to 'tell me a secret'. Usually the secret is "I wuv you", which is very nice to hear. Saturday the youngest three all had bowel issues, and he woke up from his nap and had a bit of an overflow. He just stood there and yelled until I heard him and came to clean him up, which took awhile:( As I was putting new clothes on him, he said he needed to tell me a secret. His secret? "Mom, I'm done with my nap." Yeah kiddo, I sorta figured...

Naomi- one of her jobs is to help me with the laundry, so as we were folding laundry she came across a pair of shorts she likes. She said she loved them because they had flowers on them. Smart alec me said "Then why don't you marry them!" Her reply: "Bees have to marry flowers, and besides, I already had to marry macaroni and cheese the other day."

Joel- He never wants his nails cut because he says it hurts. I was trimming his nails and told him it wouldn't hurt. After a few nails, he matter-of-factly says, "Mom, I love you, but you're hurting me."

Joely calls chapstick 'woop-stick', tissues 'two-thews', and chocolate 'twock-it'.

Little Green Stickers

When the moving company moved our stuff here from Rockford, they tagged every box, tub, piece of furniture, and package of diapers with numbered stickers to keep track of what was put on the truck. Even David's motorcycle had a little green sticker on it.

As we unpacked, we pulled stickers off of everything we owned. For months, I found them in countless places. Under the dining room table. On Hope's bed. On Jody.

Monday we unloaded the motorhome when we got home from camping. David put all the books we'd taken in a little garbage can to carry them all inside. Yesterday as the garbage can was sitting by the door with a pile of things to go back to the motorhome, I noticed a little green sticker on the side of it.....I guess I missed that one.

And, of course, the sight of the sticker made me regret, for the ten millionth time in the last four years, that we ever left Rockford. What seemed like such a good idea has turned out to be one of our biggest regrets. Darn stickers- I really didn't need that reminder.

6.1.2010

"It's a........David, why don't you tell us."
"It's a boy!"
"No. No. No, it isn't. ......... No."
"Well, there's a penis, so I think it is."

I remember just laying there in shock. I remember thinking,'it can't be a boy'. I remember saying his cry sounded like Joel's. Duh, he's a newborn- they all sound pretty similar. I remember throwing up. In all fairness, that was probably due more to the anesthetic than the shock. I remember wondering what in the heck we were going to name him. David was pushing Daniel instead of Isaiah.

I was SO positive this baby was a girl. I was nauseous just like I was with both girls. With Joel, I had some nausea, but at random times, not every afternoon and evening without fail. This baby just squirmed around and kicked enough to know it was awake, but nothing painful. With Joel, he kicked so hard I thought he was trying to kick his way out. It HURT. Not just "hey kid, quit kicking me in the ribs" kind of hurt. I'd yell at him and hit him back kind of hurt. This pregnancy was just like both girls; this baby must be a girl too.

After we checked into the hospital and they got all the preliminary stuff done, David and I had about an hour to sit in our room before surgery. I remember asking him if, when Zach was born, he was disappointed that he wasn't a girl. He said no, he was surprised, but then the joy of having a baby sort of took over and he didn't really care. Odd that I asked him that, since that exact situation was about to happen to me.

But I did care. I wanted Leah. I wanted another sweet little girl to dress up in all my cute little girl clothes. Even as I sat in my hospital room, poring over a name book some nurse dug up for me, I mourned that this wasn't my Leah. I suppose I simply mourned my expectations, and mourned the fact that I would never have another girl. I was happy about a boy, because I also remember rocking Joel to sleep many nights, mourning the fact that I {thought I} wouldn't have another boy. But when life doesn't hand you what you expect, you have to readjust to the new reality.

Now I have another son.

Biking

Yes, I know she's 8. Yes, I know she still has training wheels on her bike. There really aren't any flat-ish areas around here for her to practice. Even the main street that runs perpendicular to us slopes downhill, and she freaks out when she starts going faster.

But, wait. Now, she is 8 years and 1 day old, and the training wheels are no more!



She rode all around the campground the first night we got there and was out first thing in the morning riding some more. David took off her training wheels, ran beside her for three or four laps around the area we were camping in, and then she was riding by herself. She had SO. MUCH. FUN. riding that bike all over the camp! She was pretty good at knowing where she was in relation to our campsite, and she would take Naomi around too so that they weren't stuck riding with Joel the entire weekend. She has issues with feeling like she isn't good at anything, I'm sure thanks in large part to her somewhat hypercritical mother, so it was great for her to really feel like she was excelling at something. Her face was a permagrin as long as she was riding around.

But now all I hear is "Can I go ride my bike?".

More Changes

I like it when David is home. Really, I do. But somehow, even with four little munchkins, the house stays cleaner when David is gone.

No- not the house. The kitchen. If the kitchen and kitchen table are clean, I'm pretty ok with the rest of the house being a mess.

And David- how do I say this nicely- doesn't believe in the importance of a garbage can? Or putting things away? Usually, my cleaned-off kitchen counter survives until about .04 seconds after he enters the kitchen when he gets home.

But seriously, I do like having him home. The kitchen is a sacrifice.

And having a clean kitchen is my reward for putting up with him being gone so much!

He left at 3:30 this morning.

Joel got up at 7:30.

I got up at 8:00.

By 8:30, the clean dishes in the dishwasher (that had been there for two days) were put away, the dirty dishes that somehow get left on the counter, table, family room coffee table, family room floor were loaded into the dishwasher and being washed, the counters were cleared and washed down, and the kitchen table was washed off, ready for Hopester to spend the entire. freaking. day. at it doing her one hour of schoolwork.

See:








And just to prove that my house is a huge mess and I just move my piles of crap around, here's a picture of my desk, that obviously didn't receive the same attention as the kitchen:)

Changes

Joel has lost the privilege of having anything in his bedroom. He now has a hotel. No personalization, nothing he owns. Just a bed that we've allowed him to sleep in.

He has come to hate being locked in his bedroom. HATES it. Big temper tantrum, kicking, screaming, hates it.

So we changed the rules. I won't lock him in his room.

At first.

He gets one try to stay in his bed. If he gets out of bed, the door gets locked.

It usually takes until I get to the top of the stairs before I hear him get out of bed. So I go back and tell him that since he couldn't obey and stay in his bed, the door will need to be locked. Usually he's ok with that.

Friday night wasn't usually. Screaming, yelling, banging on the door. Pulled out every dresser drawer and emptied it on the floor.

Saturday night wasn't bad. I don't even think he got locked in at first.

But after I put the girls to bed, I went into his room to check on him. He had taken the almost-full bottle of baby powder and created a snowstorm in his bedroom. Everywhere. Powder on every horizontal surface he could reach. He even climbed into Daniel's crib so he could reach a stack of Rubbermaid totes with too big/too small clothes in them.

So his bedroom got cleaned out. I took out the dresser, changing table, lamp, laundry basket, chair, ottoman. He lost all stuffed animals, blankets, extra pillows, water cup, toys, books.

His room now contains a bed, 1 blanket, 1 pillow, and a crib, simply because I didn't want to take it apart to get it out of the room.

The bad part is he does still have things in his closet. His shelves of clothes will call to him to be destroyed, I'm sure. I emptied the toy box of all toys, but I left the shelves and bins there. He probably won't bother the cases of diapers, and if he leaves those alone, he won't discover that the bottom boxes in the stacks contain not diapers, but the previously mentioned removed toys:)

Last night he stayed in bed after one warning. I closed the closet door to hopefully remove the temptation to tear it apart since I'd removed all other things to destroy. I had taken his nightlight in the purge, and he got out of bed to turn his light on and cry about it. I went back in, gave him back the nightlight, put him back in bed, and locked the door. I even stayed in the next room to listen for awhile, and he didn't get back out of bed.

We'll see how long it takes before he figures out how to destroy something else in there.

The Oldest Child

I've been reading a birth order book the past few weeks. Hope has gotten more attitude-y, sullen, disobedient in sneaky ways, and I figured understanding the drawbacks and precautions for firstborns would be a good step in changing those behaviours.

I've always assumed I was a displaced firstborn, because I don't have the achiever syndrome characteristic of a firstborn, and Mandy does. So I figured she became the "firstborn" and I shifted more to a middle-born personality.

I figured wrong. No, I don't have the overachieving aspect, but I have the list-making, perfectionist, my-house-is-never-tidy-enough, compulsively organized aspects of a controlling, powerful firstborn. "The powerful firstborn needs to be in control. You hear statements from him like 'You will do what I say' and 'I guess I have to do it myself if I want it done right'. They're perfectionsistic and they expect everyone around them to toe the line exactly the way they want it toed....These firstborns don't have to be aggressive to be powerful; they can also be shy and moody...". Hmm- that sounds alot like someone I know.

So, I'm a firstborn. And I can tell Hope definitely is too. David, though, is more a middleborn, I think. Amy is close enough in age that I think she took over the oldest role. David may even be a baby, and Sara became the oldest of Linda and Jerry's family. Actually, I'm quite sure that's what happened. Amy is oldest, David is baby, Sara is oldest of the second-time-around family. If anyone thinks she isn't a perfectionist, then they haven't met her/seen her/heard anything about her. David not being a functional firstborn means we may not kill each other:)

So now to figure out about the other three munchkins. Joel should be a firstborn, being the oldest boy. I'm quite sure Daniel will be a baby- easygoing, funny, low maintenance. Naomi is going to be a typical middle child, I think. Which means I need to lighten up on Hope and spend more time with Naomi. I'll wait until I figure out if I'm going to murder Joel before I worry about the boys' birth order stuff.